Monday, April 13, 2015

An Alien’s diary

13th April 2015


Today I discovered a planet in the universe. After years of research I came to know about this planet called earth where there is life just like our planet. I have captured their TV signals and studied their ads to understand their lives. But people from this planet seem to be different than ours. I have planned to visit the earth in disguise to study the life on earth. But before that let me make a list of things which I need to study.
First of all I need to be aware while brushing my teeth. I came to know that while brushing the teeth early morning, beautiful actresses slam the door and enter the bathroom asking whether your toothpaste has salt or neem. How strange it is!
After that I also need to use the deodorant carefully. I also came to know that hot girls jump into the house after using the deodorants. Some may even run behind me on the roads.
The germs in the toilets on earth are as big as ghosts. Women out there use some toilet cleaning liquids just like weapons. Sometimes some actors also suddenly visit homes and clean the toilets. Strange!
Well I also noticed that the cosmetics here are more nourishing than the food the humans eat. The cosmetics are filled with natural ingredients and eatables with preservatives.  
To add to the list of strange things, people consider stains on clothes as good. (Daag ache hai!). Who in this universe except on earth will like stains on their clothes.  
Some of the chocolates are so strange that people behave as if they go mad after eating it. I saw an ad which showed two brothers named Ramesh & Suresh eat a chocolate forget their senses for a while eating consuming it.
People on earth also have developed malt food for their kids to grow taller, stronger and sharper. I intend to bring lots of it on way back to our planet so that I can sell it here. Kids on our planet will definitely be benefited by it.
Another product I came across is bathing soaps on earth make the women look like college going girls. Women using these soaps have children of 5 to 7 years but look, dance or play just like any college going girl. Even the people on earth don’t believe it unless the women’s daughter calls her ‘Mummy’.
The fairness creams on earth also seem to make people fair in 15 days. But I wonder why people in some parts are still dark. That is one of the points I will study during my stay there.
Another strange thing is that just like pets, the mobile networks on earth also follow the people wherever the people go. Recently there has been a rise in people studying through internet networks. Some also study weird faculties like economics and biology together using the internet network.
There is still confusion between their minds whether mangoes are available in which season. Some say there is a season while some say that mangoes are available the whole year.
There are many more doubts in my mind. I will come to know about the answers only after my visit to earth.

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